STUCK AND UNSTUCK — PARISIAN SCENE OPENS UP ABOUT CONFIDENCE, CREATIVITY AND IDENTITY
There’s a lot of subjects every human being, every creative individual secretly think about, face, experience, and understand. Self-confidence is an important theme part of the journey. And as each of us goes through a different and unique one, we chose three creatives from our community – Beto Neri, Didi Han, and Sidikey – to share their intimate thought process about it.
BETO:
Do you consider yourself to be self-confident? If so, how did you build it and how do you nourish it ?
I chose to be confident. This choice came out of necessity… Living my truth as a black bisexual man in this industry, it has always pushed me to fit in the colonizers standards. No one seemed to understand my truth or my timing. So, my self-confidence was knowing that I was the only person left I could count on. This was the most beautiful and scary start I could have in my self-confidence journey.
I nourish my self-confidence through my choices. It’s very important to me to be in control of my path even if I understand that my journey on Earth is not something I can fully control. Good clothes, nice perfume and a fresh also haircut helps me a lot.
In what frame do you feel most comfortable with yourself ? Parties, communities, other settings, on your own ?
The moments I feel the most comfortable with myself is when I’m with my community or when I’m working on a project I truly believe in. Community is everything for me.
When I see myself in people that I love… I understand how important it is to feel fully valued. Sometimes, even when I’m not feeling 100%, knowing that I have people around me who look at me as someone who inspires them to be better… it puts me in a position where I say to myself : « Okay, i’m doing the right thing ». I wouldn’t be comfortable knowing that I’m not fully living my truth or knowing that what I’m doing is fake.
As a human being but also has a creative person, what is your relationship with doubt and questioning yourself or your creative activity ?
I grew up with a lot of confrontations. I always had to prove I knew something, that I could do something… that I was someone… And somehow I didn’t have the time to question myself about my choices when I was younger… what I actually liked… What were my possibilities ? When you grow up in a survivor mode, the vulnerability of the doubt is not really appreciated. I’m happy to be in a better place now, where I can question myself 24 hour a day. Even if people can’t see it, i’m always doing meetings in my head with my 300 personalities. It’s a very important moment for me.
“I chose to be confident. This choice came out of necessity”.
What can make you lose confidence in yourself – even temporarily ?
I lose my confidence when I try to please others instead of living my truth. It’s a very annoying situation when I realize what I’m actually doing it. People came into our lives full of projections, mainly those who see me first on social media.
How do you deal with it ? What's your keys and advices to others ?
I feel that right now, I deal way better than before with that situation. Get to know myself better was really important. My advice to pleasers: it's not your responsibility to fit on people’s projections. Please, treat you well.
What do you really like about yourself and want to celebrate ?
I love the fact that I’m a loving person, that I love celebrating love, giving and receiving love. Not the romantic one. I love the love that pushes us to be and willing to be the best version of ourselves. You know… the girls need love…
Didi Han :
Do you consider yourself to be self-confident? If so, how did you build it and how do you nourish it ?
Yes, I think I'm a confident person.I think it started with my parents'support since I was young. They always have supported and believed in what I love and do. That makes me go ahead to do what I believe. Also, the belief I can truly achieve everything makes me trust myself strongly.
In what frame do you feel most comfortable with yourself ? Parties, communities, other settings, on your own ?
The most comfortable place I feel in is during parties I play in, with my crowd or DJ booths rather than in the crowd or other parties. Because I have built nice crowd now and I built a new one during every set, from start to finish. I am always surrounded by things that I love, like my place, yes the most comfortable place is definitely my home.
As a human being but also a creative person, what is your relationship with doubt and questioning yourself or your creative activity ?
When I feel blocked, I tried to be chill and do things not related to creativity. Go to the park and take a breath of fresh air, meet friends or go to the library, vinyl stores. But If I still want have the urge to do creative things, I start a new project or work on an ongoing one. I try not to get too stressed because I think the answer will naturally come to you when you are in good conditions.
“I think the answer will naturally come to you when you are in good conditionS.”
What can make you lose confidence in yourself – even temporarily ?
When I hear someone say criticizes another person's art.
How do you deal with it ? What's your keys and advices to others ?
I think the world is big so you don't need to adjust to it and you will find people who likes you, in the end.
What's your very own motto ?
Believe in yourself !
What do you really like about yourself and want to celebrate ?
I’m doing my thing like a marathon.
I am not really afraid to fail as I know I can handle it and just keep moving.
SIDIKEY:
Do you consider yourself to be self-confident? If so, how did you build it and how do you nourish it ?
Yeah, I consider myself self confident. Travelling really help me though, seeing different cultures always helps me to know better who I am.
In what frame do you feel most comfortable with yourself ? Parties, communities, other settings, on your own ?
During every creative moment.
As a human being but also has a creative person, what is your relationship with doubt and questioning yourself or your creative activity ?
My relationship with doubt is a everyday thing, like every creative person I think. It helps you to not do some bullshit but also restricts you. Sometimes it’s 50/50. Those rainy cold days in Paris. Like the weather really got me sometimes.
How do you deal with it ? What's your keys and advices to others ?
Change your environment, go where you’re not confortable, find what you like, don’t try to be someone else.
What do you really like about yourself and want to celebrate ?
I like the fact that I feel free now that I found myself, and I don’t need nobody. I celebrate it everyday.
“THE ONLY FAILURE IS NOT to TRY.”
Virgil Abloh
Shot by @Kiroubel
Written by @Redkoffee_